Soagi, Our Driver

Finally, I've got pictures of Soagi. As you can see, he's a tiny, old guy! He bows so much around me that he's kinda hunched over most of the time. It was nice to see him stand up with Jim for the photo.

He seems older than he is, I believe. He walks with an old-man's shuffle and moves very slowly but I think he's just in his early 60s.

Soagi is a very devout Muslim.

Soagi has 5 children -- 3 boys and 2 girls. I think he has only 2 grandchildren. I believe only one daughter is married. #1 son is the chief mechanical engineer at the Novotel. #2 son is a pilot for Mandala Airlines and is based in Jakarta. I'm confused on the others -- a daughter works with computers, the other daughter -- I'm not sure. The youngest is his #3 son and he is a student at a university in Samarinda. He speaks almost exclusively about the boys. It took a long time to even hear anything about his wife. All that I now know is that he was married to her when they moved from the island of Java to Balikpapan in the 70s. He's most proud of #2 son -- the pilot. But he speaks of all three sons. The youngest is being assisted with university expenses by #1 and #2 sons and the oldest daughter.

The only other time he's mentioned his wife was when he told me that he has instructed her to never call him when he is working unless it is an emergency. But he takes phone calls ... He's very pro male in all of his perspectives, except, it seems, with me.

This will be an unusual relationship. Certainly not the open and family-like friendship I had with Jide. Oh, how I miss Jide! Between the language barriers and the cultural barriers, it's tough to get to know Soagi. But he keeps a constant smile on his face, seems overwhelmingly grateful for everything we do for him, and doesn't seem offended in the least that I don't dress as a proper Muslim woman would dress.

He's incredibly cautious, to the point of seeming fearful. I don't know if he drove for a Missus who was rude and demanding ... maybe that's it. But, he won't even put the car into drive until I've been seated and buckled for a while. Then he says, "Okay, Missus?" And I say "Okay." And we move. Jim quietly smirks at this whenever he witnesses it. If I just buckle up and say "okay," it's not enough ... he sticks to the routine -- we sit a bit (maybe he's praying a blessing on the car?) and then he says, "Okay, Missus?"

He's very protective of me. When Jim and I were hiking out and about on Saturday, Soagi was always hovering, saying things like "Be careful, Missus!" "Danger, Missus!" "I help, Missus!"

Again, I'm not sure what it is that drives his concerns but I can only assume that it's some kind of deep fear.

Another interesting tidbit -- he can only eat tidbits! He was, it seems, born at 7 months instead of 9 months. The way he explained it to me with broken English and Indonesian was interesting! I think I understood correctly. Anyway, he couldn't breast-feed (he demonstrated that one 'cuz he didn't know the English! that was weird!) so his mother raised him on cow's milk. But he's never been able to eat anything that's big -- only small fishes and shrimp. No beef, goat, etc. I don't even think he can eat chicken. I don't know why he can't eat small bites of big food but it's something to do with his digestion. He said that he gets sick. He can't have coffee, either. So, I don't know how often I'll buy him food when I'm out. I've already given him a can of iced coffee for when he broke his fast one day. Bummer. And I brought him some dinner once when he was going to be waiting for us to eat dinner. Fortunately it was little, rolled shrimp balls.

Soagi and Lusy are out running some errands right now -- going to the outdoor market that I prefer to avoid (I'm just not into the mixed odors of fresh fish, chicken, beef, durian, ... and the visual of rats scurrying around under the tables!), buying more bottles of water, and getting some photocopying done for my English class that starts tomorrow (yipppppppeeeeeeee!), ...

They seem to get along very well. Lusy helps translate when Soagi and I just can't get details clarified! (Like what days he wants off next week for Idul Fitri.)

And Soagi continues to baby all of my plants. He's nurturing some shoots he started -- he filled one entire long pot with mint shoots. If there's any mint in there at all, there's no point in planting anything else 'cuz the mint'll take over. So, after they've gotten strong I'll go out to a plant vendor and buy another pot and try to communicate that I'd like to grow some other herbs!

He's a sweetie ... it's just a bit exhausting being around him, though! We'll see how it goes ...