Monday, December 10, 2007

Little Lives with Big Needs

So, I promised I'd blog about a couple of dear boys who live near our beach hut.

Firstly, let me explain the big picture. Our beach hut is about 1 1/2 hours from the island areas of Lagos. (If there weren't "go slows" then we'd get there in about 40 minutes!) We travel with armed escorts because anything out of our little island area is off limits to ex pats without escorts (and even WITH escorts for some of the areas!)

Our drive takes us past hundreds of thousands of places where people live -- the "big man's" houses/villas that look opulent but upon closer view really aren't much; the shanties that are shelters made of corrugated metal; the squatters who are making a home out of one area of an unfinished building while the owner scrambles for another ten years to try to get the funds to get the place finished. (Vines and squatters grow in these situations at about the same rate -- overnight!)

Our hut is along a row of beach huts that are generally leased to people such as us. To reach it, we go through 4 villages -- an experience in itself. See a few photos:










Some of the villagers are wealthy and just maintain a little place in their home village. Generally, though, most of those who have obtained some level of wealth have moved away and have quickly forgotten the family they have left behind. Stories abound of fathers who have sacrificed in order to send one son to school in order to gain a better standard of living. Generally, the son gains his education (notice I didn't say a "quality education!"), gains a fairly decent job, and abandons the father and family who've made the sacrifices.

So, we always assume that the people we meet in the villages are desperate for anything. The children are adorable and always tug at our hearts. From our first visit there, we began the custom of handing out sweets (lollies, candies) to the kids when we are ready to leave.

The first time we tried this it was quite chaotic and the kids dropped the candy wrappers all over the ground as they ran off giggling with delight. After that, our driver, Jide, had a chat with the kids and since then they always form a nice queue and keep their trash (at least until they're beyond our sight!). Each visit, when the day is growing long and we are thinking about needing to pack up the car, we begin to hear the laughter of children as they gather outside the fence. They know what's coming. And the stragglers rush down the path to get to us before the treats run out.

We try to find little jobs for the kids to do. 'Gbenga is the 12 year old that we've gotten to know a bit. He always shinnies up the coconut palm trees with a machete in his mouth in order to get us some fresh coconuts. On a good day, when we have guests with us, he can make even N1,000 (almost $7). That's a huge profit even after he has paid the owner of the trees!










Ishak is a little guy, a 7 year old who has become the official "fanner" for Martin when Martin is grilling the food for lunch. Martin is our friend from Austria who absolutely loves to cook and considers it restful to slave over a hot grill for the day! So, I bought a fan from a vendor so that Martin can at least be cooled.

Well, the last time we were there with a bunch of friends, a friend found out that I was paying Ishak to fan Martin and she wanted to contribute. We gathered all of our small bills and I gave him a little pile of money. He and I counted it together and I fought back tears as I watched his eyes get wider as we approached the total. It was N320 -- a little over $2. After he stopped saying "tank you, Mudduh!" I asked him what he was going to do with the money. Without hesitation he said, "buy school sandals, Mudduh." OK, I held the tears off just long enough to get into the "toilet" and have a good, though silent, cry.

That's what lead us to finding out more about these two guys -- 'Gbenga and Ishak. Ishak's mother died when he was young and his father's second wife took him in. But when his father died and the step-mom remarried, he became less valued. The woman now has other children. He has a roof over his head but that's about it. It's better than 'Gbenga's situation, though. 'Gbenga has no one. He's lived on his own for quite a few years. He tries to earn food or money by helping where ever he can. And he lives wherever he can find a place to lay his head. He seems to enjoy the freedom this affords him, though.

Amazingly, both boys are in school. Even the public schools cost money for "fees," dashes (bribes) to the teachers, books, uniforms, ...

So, with the advise from our driver (who, out of his own poverty, gave 'Gbenga N500 on a previous visit to help with some school fees ... and, quite to Jide's credit, never told us about it!) we decided to give each of the two boys some money as Christmas gifts. Jide will oversee the use and check in with the boys during the time we are on vacation (Jide's family lives 6 villages down and grew up in the area and will be there for two weeks during our/his vacation). Depending upon how they have managed by the time we return in January, we hope to give them additional money. They plan on keeping the money a secret. Jide was getting word to Ishak's "guardians" so that they would not think Ishak had stolen the money. 'Gbenga told Jide that the only person he was going to tell was his big brother who lives in a village in the area. 'Gbenga was soooooo excited that as soon as we left he planned on running to the brother's village to share his good news (and probably to share the money, too!)

The corruption and the poverty can be so overwhelming that you just close your eyes to it all. We pray that we will never close our eyes but that we will be able to see ways that we can, just as little people ourselves, make some kind of long-term impact.

We'll keep you posted (pun intended!).

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