Bahrain

Our drive on the "freedom bridge!" -- the 21 mile causeway between Saudi and Bahrain. There are 6 check points to pass through along the way. A little glitch was created by the inept-ness of the processes (or lack of process) within Jim's company and it caused us to get turned back at one check point due to one missing piece of paper that would enable us to bring our car out of Saudi. So, we parked our car back on the Saudi side and got a taxi ... We were grateful that it happened on Wed. afternoon when there were still people in the office who could get the mess sorted out in time for us to enter with the car on Saturday on the way to the Bahrain airport for our trip to Paris!

View out of our hotel window when we finally arrived.

Our hotel has a private beach with such high salt co

ntent that you couldn't sink if you tried. We tried.

And the sun was setting over the bay ...

Outside the fabulous museum. Truly a splendid place -- small but rivaling British museums, even, in quality. We must go back. We came back to the area in the evening for a concert. Equally fabulous. 7 male vocalists. A cappella. In Latin, French, and some Arabic. Amazing. They even sang many sacred Latin pieces with words that I didn't think were legal in a

muslim country. But, hey, Bahrain is called the "Las Vegas" of the middle east -- very open-minded!

The ceiling in one area of one of the many amazing malls.

Jim is ordering coffee and tea at ... get this ... Caribou Coffee!

Minnesota's influence is far-reaching! ;)

Floating ... effortlessly!

All in all, our trip was AMAZING! We've decided that we'll come here at least once a month, especially in months when we're not going elsewhere. We saw Inception in one of many movie theatres (theatres are illegal where we live). Oddly enough, it's the only movie I've seen in a theatre in many, many months and I've seen it in two places -- I saw it with my sis in Anchorage. Jim hadn't seen it. It was great to see it, again! The malls played music very tastefully. It was actually nice to hear music, even canned music, again. (Public music is illegal ... live and canned. Even not supposed to listen to it on car radios, I guess.) And that abaya? The tradition is to take it off while still in the car, on the causeway, as soon as passing immigration and customs stops into Bahrain! :-) Shopping without it was delightful! and being able to use a dressing room -- a treat! We saw quite a few black-tented, eye-slitted women. We've been told that most of them are Saudi women who are shopping with their husbands on the weekend. Bahrain is clean, modern, friendly ... the driving is smooth, safe, with drivers being incredibly polite (even as they speak derogatorily against the drivers from "that" place!) What a treat to see women behind the wheel ... maybe I should organize a group of gals to come over in a company bus for a day? We could rent a car in multiple names and take turns driving -- no shopping, no eating, just driving! :-) Crazy, I know!

Yes, that's my leg. No, it's not permanent. It's henna. I had it done at our ladies' meeting/brunch a few days earlier in our compound. Henna painting is extremely popular in this region. Proof, once again, of everyone's desire to have an individualistic voice. The popularity of the tradition is in direct proportion to the lack of freedom of dress, lower freedoms = higher henna painting.

So, I decided to post more photos from the ladies' event. I

didn't take pictures until most of the women were gone 'cuz you can't just take photos of women in groups -- you have to ask each person's permission. These are some of the more liberal women from countries in the area. Lovely gals! The final shots include the amazing artist. Notice her hands, she dips the tips in a bowl of henna and holds still for 15 minutes! She does all of her work free-hand, quickly assessing the style of the woman before she begins her work. It kinda emerges out of her mind as she works. Notice how conservative and subtle mine is compared with those of the gals who were more accustomed to getting the painting done and are from other countries in the region. It would really bug me to have it on my hands, I think. But hand painting is guaranteed to be seen even when the woman is in an abaya with face covered and all ... curious, isn't it? How we long to have our "voice" heard in an setting ... fitting in even while our voice is heard ...

Black and White

Black and white. Right and wrong. Cut and dried.

You would think that in a land that is bursting at the seams with rules, there would be no nuances and no need to analyze the meanings of our actions. But it's not that easy. I have found myself reading online discussions and participating in face-to-face discussions with many women (and some men) about abayas and I fear that this topic will ALWAYS be the topic of choice for struggling expats. I would like to be able to make a decision about where I fit into it all and just move on. But it's not that easy.

I often wear black. It's a good color for me. As I have put on some extra pounds (which I'm now tackling full force with an aerobics class!) I have regularly chosen black items out of my closet of options. But now, after just one month in black-tent-land, I really am beginning to loathe the color.

We're going to Bahrain for the weekend and I've already decided that I'm going to look for some white or light or bright tops! (I'll tell you all about Bahrain, I'm sure -- no abayas required, no dress codes at all! You can try on clothes in the clothing store -- such a novel concept! Men and women can mix and actually speak to one another! And there can be public music -- we're going to attend a vocal concert at the museum! But I'm straying far from my topic so I'll now return ...)

Why is the color black so frustrating, now? It seems to symbolize so much that I'm against -- oppression of women, isolation of women, overt control of women, the smothering of all individuality, ... Add to that the impracticality of the abaya -- the restriction of women's movements, the limiting of women's activities (playing tennis, riding a dune buggy, riding a bike, even going for a walk is impossible in such gear!) Throw on the head covering and face covering and, yikes, women become a sea of anonymity. Which is the intent. Which makes me angry -- for myself, for the women who know nothing else, for the women who love it, for the women who hate it, ...

So, I can't decide what to do about it. As I've mentioned before, some expat women wear the head covering and others don't. But I've noticed that my blonde hair is really quite unusual and it causes the men (and women) to stare. And lear. And gawk. In Nigeria and in Indonesia, I was used to being stared at but this staring is different. From some of the men it's just disgusting and filthy. From others, it's unnerving because I'm disturbing them and that's not my intention.

I just want to say "I respect you but I don't agree with you." But respect is earned and not mandated. And wearing the abaya seems to say that I've already caved in.

So ... I'm considering wearing a non-black headscarf. I have plenty -- white, black and white, blue, ... I always see a few women with non-black scarves in the malls. One new friend told me that the Egyptian women do that here. But it's no secret that most of the locals hate people from that country. So I certainly don't want to create a new problem!

Jim suggested that we do a test in the big mall -- I walk around in my current manner (scarf-less) with Jim following behind and watching the reaction; then I put on my black and white scarf and he follows; then I put on my black hijab and he follows.

I want to go unnoticed. But I want to be an individual. I don't want to be defiant. But I want to make a statement. Respect and courtesy without agreement. It would be nice if it went both ways.

We need some concrete data.

We're looking for the elusive black and white, cut and dried answer ...

Hours of the Day

We will feel victorious when we master the art of arriving at a shop to do shopping and finding the doors open! We have no sense of victory as of yet ...

During Ramadan, shop hours are open on a very strange and hard-to-predict non-schedule. It's all up to the shop owner. Of course, if they serve food or drink, they're closed until sundown. But then they close for prayer which is right around that time. So they might open at 6:30. And close before 7. And then re-open after prayers. Or, then again, they might stay open through prayers. Or they might close their doors, but let you in if you knock. Or not. Or, they might not open until after prayers, like around 8 p.m. Or maybe 7:40. It's better to not even try to shop until after 8 p.m. But then the malls are PACKED until 2 a.m. and who wants to shop in that sea of humanity that's crawling with black and white slow-moving tents?

With Ramadan and other holidays completed, we thought we'd see what "normal" is. Mmmmm. Haven't fully grasped it, yet!

Some places open early, like around 8 a.m. Others open around 9 a.m. Many, if not most, open by 10 a.m. But that doesn't last long. Prayers hit somewhere around 11:30. and during that time, they close. But maybe not. Sometimes you can continue shopping but you just can't check out. There can be no exchanging of money during prayer times. Which last for 20 minutes. But to prepare for the prayer times, announcements begin about 30 minutes prior to prayer. And they are repeated every 3 minutes or so. And sometimes you're told that you have to pay and leave in the next 15 minutes. Sometimes you're told you can shop but not buy anything after the prayer time ends. Sometimes they turn out all lights and lock you out. Sometimes they close the doors and leave lights on and you're locked in. It's hard to know which it will be because when you look around you, some of the people are rushing to finish shopping and others seem un-phased.

Afternoons are not good times to go anywhere. Stores close from mid-day prayer until late afternoon -- that's roughly from 11:30 until 4:30. And then between 4:30 and 7:30, they're closed for a couple more prayer times. Then, they're open until, usually, midnight. But you never can count on that because opening hours are not mandated. Grocery store types of shops usually remain open all day. But not always. And some close for prayer. But let you shop. You see the trend, yes?

Chaos and confusion. For me, at least. Our company publishes a calendar with prayer times for each week. But even that seems confusing to me.

Basically, I know I can shop from 10:00 until 11:20ish in the morning. And I know I can shop from 7:30ish until 10:00 in the evening. Any other times, attempts to shop are taken with great risk and very low expectations.

It's really quite an effective way to save money!

(That, and the fact that the clothing stores only have dressing rooms for men. Women have to buy their clothing without trying anything on and then they have up to one week to make returns. Some restrooms in the malls have "fitting rooms" so that women can try on clothing that they've already bought and then make the returns right then ... sounds like another topic for a blog entry ...)

Time Fills and Time Flies

Filling time helps time to fly.

It's nice to have some demands on my time and some things that really MUST be done rather than just things I'd LIKE to do! Not just to fill time, but to make a contribution, to meet other gals and to develop friendships --I've started teaching English students, already.

We have two classes, Levels 1 and 2, with a few gals in each class. Chinese, many South Americans, a Russian, Indonesians, ... fun! I'll pick up some of their words here and there, too, I hope! No Arabic-speakers, yet. Hope to get some, though. So far, the students' commitment levels are very high and they want to recruit some more students.

In the "I'd like to" category -- I'm crocheting a throw blanket. The ACs (air conditioners) make things quite chilly when they're on and you're in the direct line of their fans. But when they're off, it swiftly gets too hot. So, a nearby blankie is the best solution. I found pale blue yarn in a terrific yarn/fabric/craft shop last week. The quality is nothing great, equal to Red Heart, I suppose. But it's filling time, it gives me some goals for the day, and it will meet a need when I'm done with the project. By the time it's done, I hope our shipment will have arrived. In it is a whole lot more yarn that I'll put to use right away for another necessary item that is temperature-related -- socks/footies. The marble floors retain the cold air wonderfully. Too well, actually. So my feet need to be toastier. The problem I foresee with wearing socks is that it will turn the marble floors into a skating rink. Should add to the excitement around here, though!

There's another rather strange way that time flies around here. The weekly rhythm has not really set in, yet. I've heard from others that it never really does. We are soooooo used to "our" weekend -- Saturday and Sunday. And we still are linked to it via TV and contact with family and friends. So, even though Saturdays and Sundays are work days, here, they don't fully feel like work days. Watching weekend sports on FOX Sports probably contributes heavily to that. And Thursdays and Fridays are real weekend days. Even though Jim continues working on those days (as always!) ... his schedule is lighter, he works from home, and we mix it up with outings and fun activities. So that leaves Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday as "real" work days. And when it's Wednesday, it's always a shock that we're back to the weekend, again! Some who have been here much longer say that they still are shocked when it's already Wednesday again! All good! I do love this kind of time to fly!

Add to that, the fact that I arrived during the month of Ramadan. And that was followed by the week of Eid ul Fitr. And then we had Saudi National Day. It's no wonder I don't have a sense of rhythm, yet! We've not had a "regular" week!

Going shopping on the ladies' bus fills time. It's an almost-three-hour trek to get to one shop 'cuz the bus route includes a few drop off and pick up points. Women can't drive. Jim has a company car which enables us to get out together in the evenings. But if I want to shop during the daytime I have to use one of the buses that our company provides for the women. It involves a dreadfully complicated sign-up system with lots of room for disasters and squabbles and such. It's nice to have the buses available, at least. But I don't think I'll use them that often.

It's not really filling time ... it's more like killing time. And time doesn't fly when its dead!

Coping Strategies

So I'm working on coping strategies. Some days are better than others.

A practice that I tried to make a habit in Indonesia and rely heavily upon, here, is this one: whenever the prayers are broadcasted ("blasted" would be a more accurate term!) I pray and, if I'm in an appropriate place, sing some worship songs/hymns that relate to the Trinity or Jesus Christ -- God's only Son. That helps.

I usually sleep through the early morning (4:30 - 5:30ish) prayers, having adjusted to the noise. That means only 4 other 20 minute stretches per day.

Where I am totally failing in coping strategies is when I'm out and about in the sea of black tents (women in abayas and hijabs). In other countries where coverings are common I am not so bugged by the garments. I guess it seems more like a personal choice -- some women choose black, some choose lovely pastel scarves and western clothing, ... I realize that for some of the gals it is forced upon them by their husbands. Or by the ultra conservative teachers in their region. Or their fathers. But that's more of a private, family issue. Frustrating but tolerable.

But here ...

Well, it's just sooo irritating to see it forced upon every woman, regardless of her beliefs and convictions.

But what's even more baffling is the women who go beyond the required covering to gloves, slits-only face coverings, undecorated black, ... I've asked expats about the "whys" and Jim's been able to talk with one male Saudi with whom he works. There are no clear answers. It's not the law, though in more conservative areas of the country like Riyahd, it is.

Sometimes it's the husbands who require it. But very often it's the choice of the woman, herself. There's some competition amongst the women, it seems, as to who is more devout. And there's a lot of pressure, I've been told, to be so devout that the husband will not need another wife in order to guarantee his good-living in eternity.

I've heard that these women live under the constant fear that their husbands might: a) get another wife (men can have up to four wives ... 1, 2, 3, 4! ... if they can prove to the gov't that they are able to financially support them and their future children) or b) divorce them.

Such fear. Such bondage. Such isolation.

The real tragedy is that many want it, are choosing it, defend it, and look down upon others who don't embrace it. And that's what's making me nuts!

It's tough to find a way to cope with that one.

P.S./FYI:

The Quran does not explicitly teach that women must be fully cloaked, have heads covered, etc. Just a couple of verses refer to it at all and it's mainly in the context of Mohammed's wives.

Here in this country, the movement for women to be covered and separated from men is quite a modern development which began in the 1980s.

Saudi Arabia's government is a monarchy with a king-chosen Council of Ministers and a king-chosen Consultative Assembly of 150 people. The constitution is the Quran. Their law is Sharia Law.

Another Holiday

This is the area called the Corniche. It's common in all mid-eastern countries -- cement walkways along the water. This one is many miles long and includes areas with American imports such as: Chili's, TGIFridays, Pizza Hut, Starbucks, McDonalds, Burger King, Krispy Kreme, ... So far we've tried Chili's (and loved the food) and will soon visit Starbucks!

Thursday was Saudi National Day, a celebration of the beginning/unification of this country on Sept 23, 1932 by King Abdul Aziz bin Saud. Because the 23rd falls on a weekend (weekends are Thursday and Friday), Saturday is a holiday, too. So Jim's working from home. But the real celebrations were Thursday. We were warned to stay away from the corniche area because there has been quite a bit of rioting in recent years during the celebrations.

The holiday was only established in 2003 and it's existence is a symbol of the shift this country is slowly making toward a government that makes some (not many, though) decisions apart from Islam. True devotees are angered by and do not recognize this holiday because they do not believe there should be any holidays other than those established by Muslim laws and traditions. They don't even believe that there should be birthday celebrations.

Here's a bit from Wikipedia about the kingdom and it's kings.

The Third Saudi state was founded by the late King Ibn Saud of Saudi Arabia. In 1902 Ibn Saudi captured Riyadh, the Al-Saud dynasty's ancestral capital, from the rival Al-Rashid family. Continuing his conquests, Abdul Aziz subdued Al-Hasa, the rest of Nejd, and the Hejaz between 1913 and 1926. Boundaries with Jordan, Iraq, and Kuwait were established by a series of treaties negotiated in the 1920s, with two "neutral zones" created, one with Iraq and the other with Kuwait. On January 8, 1926 Hussain Ibn Ali became the King of Sharqiya. On January 27, 1927 he took the title King of Nejd (his previous Nejdi title was Sultan). By the Treaty of Jeddah, signed on May 20, 1927, the United Kingdom recognized the independence of Abdul Aziz's realm (then known as the Kingdom of Hejaz and Nejd). In 1932, these regions were unified as the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia. The discovery of oil on March 3, 1938 transformed the country. The country's southern boundary with Yemen was partially defined by the 1934 Treaty of Taif, which ended a brief border war between the two states.

Abdul Aziz's military and political successes were not mirrored economically until vast reserves of oil were discovered in March 1938. Development programs, which were delayed due to the onset of the Second World War in 1939, began in earnest in 1946 and by 1949 production was in full swing. Oil has provided Saudi Arabia with economic prosperity and a great deal of political leverage in the international community. prior to his death in 1953, Abdul Aziz, aware of the difficulties facing other regional absolute rulers reliant on extended family networks, attempted to regulate the succession.

Saud succeeded to the throne on his father's death in 1953. However, by the early 1960s the Kingdom was in jeopardy due to Saud's economic mismanagement and failure to deal effectively with a regional challenge from Egyptian president Gamal Abdel Nasser. As a consequence, Saud was deposed in favor of Faisal in 1964. intra-family rivalry, echoed by increasing complications from the 1973 oil crisis, was one of the factors that led to the assassination of Faisal by his nephew, Prince Faisal bin Musa'id, in 1975. He was succeeded by King Khalid until 1982 and then by King Fahd. When Fahd died in 2005, his half-brother, Abdullah, ascended to the throne.

Out and About

The sands do blow!

Desalinization plant: our tap water is all desalinized but still quite salty!

This is something that's under construction and it's only link to land is a little walking sand-bridge, it appears.

The "Bridge to Freedom!" -- 21 mile causeway to the island country of Bahrain.

Musings Begin

My second abaya -- a bit more decorative than my first one. Now I'll always have one clean abaya. That's the plan, at least. I have a matching scarf which I carry with me but do not wear. Opinions on scarf-wearing are very mixed among the expat women. How do we show respect for the country in which we live without in any way implying that we agree with their beliefs and customs? That is the dilemma. At this point, I've determined that I will not wear the scarf unless forced to do so.

We did some painting on Thursday, wanting to get such things done prior to the arrival of our shipment.

I've been here for more than two weeks, now. You could best describe my state of mind as "in adjustment" as each day has it's ups and it's downs. I am reminded of our time in Port Harcourt, in the days when we could get out of the compound. Somedays I'd be so anxious to get out and then after being out for a short time, I'd wonder why I ever wanted to do such a thing -- the headaches came on quickly from the air pollution, loud and crazy traffic, trash, and basic madness.

Here, the headaches seem to come just as quickly as they did in Nigeria and they come from basic madness. Very little trash (except along the water's edge in places where workers aren't paid to constantly pick up what comes in with the waves). Very little pollution (but the air is filled with sand and grit). The traffic is not loud (though the drivers are still incredibly aggressive, a topic worthy of it's own blog entry very soon). None of those issues are the problem. And it's not the lack of access to food items. (I'll blog sometime soon about the shopping because that deserves it's own entry.) The madness is more within me and it's more mental, spiritual, and emotional.

My headaches come from trying to process the thinking behind what I see -- the complete segregation of men from women, the required abaya and hijab (head covering), the extreme versions of coverings that go beyond just eye-slits and include black gloves, the screens that some men require to be placed around their family's table when they eat in a restaurant that has expats present, the men who are free to frolic in the ocean or ocean-side pool with their children while their black-tented-wives hide in the shade of the 110+ sun or walk into the water and come back out wearing a now-thirty-pound-soaking-wet black tent,...

For the next few days I'll try to post some photos as well as some thoughts. I'll try to not gripe and whine but rather give you the straight truth of life as I see it. Keep in mind that those who embrace this place see it quite differently.

Alaska, Juneau Portion of trip to Tenakee

So, to get to Tenakee --- first we flew to Juneau. We spent 1 day in Juneau on both sides of our day in Tenakee.

Axel was quite a traveler, as evidenced below.

We pretty much wore out his Grandma and Grandpa, though ... as evidenced way below. :-)

Alaska, Trip to Tenakee Springs

What an amazing experience -- to go back to Tenakee Springs after leaving there with Mom and Dad in 1958. It's a small village, with a population that has hovered around 100 for many, many years. Dad was the school teacher for the '57-'58 school year. There were strong doubts that the school could not remain open the following year due to a drop in student numbers so Dad and Mom wisely packed up and moved to Homer.

Tenakee is on the Chichagof Island, out of Juneau. They were amazing adventurers, Dad and Mom, leaving the bustling area of southern California for southeast Alaska while it was just a U.S. territory!

This was a long-awaited trip ... I hope you enjoy the photos even 1/10th as much as we enjoyed the experience.

Keep in mind that the sun is a rare siting in southeast Alaska. We were blessed -- Dad, Mom, me, Kath, and little Axel --- very blessed!